Here we are at the end of a school year and the beginning of summer. For all the mamas out there, this is a big transition time! To me it’s a marker of my kids getting yet another year older and timing whizzing by. I used to feel really sad, guilty and self-critical this time of year—thinking to myself: ‘I haven’t done enough as a mom’ or ‘I wasn’t present enough for my kids’. I would get crabby, short tempered with my family and what was really going on was I felt really panicked inside—thinking ‘how am I messing up this part of my life that I hold most dear?’ Super tough on myself, I know. Through this process I wasn’t showing up for myself or my family in the way I really wanted to. Can anyone relate?
Well it’s a few weeks now into the new year, how is everything going? New Year’s Resolutions in full swing? Or you’ve already bagged those ideas!
For me, new changes can all get burned out very quickly if I live by the old paradigm of ‘keeping up’ and comparing to everyone else. This is where I’ve found pacing comes in.
We are always in such a hurry to ‘get there’, achieve, and do it all better and faster than the next person.
What are we rushing for?
I think Spring is almost here?! We have had just a few glimpses of the feeling of Spring and the response I see is everyone running around outside, finally! Like my 6 year son says, “It’s supposed to be spring, but it feels like winter!”
I am finally feeling the urge to emerge after the winter of hibernation. I’m recognizing that I’m not able to do anything that’s not authentic to me so that’s why you haven’t heard from me in a while!
In the energy world of cycles, the season of Winter is the Rhythm of Water, very Yin, internal, deep and reflective. As we enter Spring, it’s the Rhythm of Wood, which is Yang, all about expression, assertiveness, moving forward, sprouting branches and getting out into the world! Here we go!
So on that Spring note…
It reminds me of the importance and deep meaning of being grounded. What does that really mean anyway?
Who’s in charge of your energy? You or everyone else? I’m here to say it’s all you.
You can decide how your energy is spent (I have to remind myself of this often) and how it is restored. It’s a beautiful thing when that tipping point happens and you ‘get it’ that YOU are truly the only person that will take care of you. So, you’d better start paying attention! Ha! How’s that for bold and outspoken?
I’ve learned that each of us need to take care of ourselves because when we don’t it ends up impacting everyone around us. Especially those that are closest to us and we care deeply about. For instance, when I’m not getting enough sleep, or fulfilling everyone else’s needs & ignoring my own, or my thoughts are running those negative tapes, I end up with a headache & snapping at my kids and then the downward spiral happens from there.
On the flip side if I am working on how I can take care and nourish myself, that also leads to a ripple effect--impacting everyone around me, but in a positive way! I am more playful, I can laugh at myself and have a grounded perspective. That grounding thing is helpful when you have everyone’s energy coming at you from all sides. Helps you to stay connected within yourself and not get pulled into everyone else’s crap!
I love this quote. Especially for the New Year. There is no other expectation that anything should be any different than it currently is. This allow you to jump in right in. No judgement or prerequisites. Here in the present. Not based on the past and without worry for the future.
The energy of the New Year has this feeling of a fresh start, clean slate, another chance. Not that we can’t make changes or reinvent ourselves everyday but why not flow with the momentum of the beginning of the year with some of that collective energy?
To me, it’s not about New Years Resolutions either. I’m not sure I know what that is anyway. I think it’s more about becoming what you want to get. I know--that one needs to sink in a little.
Like Wayne Dyer, who has been called The Father of Motivation, said, "I attract what I am, not what I want."
I’m into self- empowerment. Enough of this victim mentality or blame game. Learning and using tools to help yourself feel the way you want to feel in your life. I keep repeating to myself and my kids, ‘Try to focus on what you DO want, instead of what you don’t want!’
Your body knows the way and can give you messages through intuitive signals and your energy systems. What am I talking about?
As my 6 year old son says, “Mom, keep the little things little!” Something he learned from his fabulous first grade teacher. She works magic in that classroom. Wow, isn’t that the truth! It can be just those little things that we blow up and can get us all bound up sometimes!
It makes me think of the season of Fall, which is the energy of Metal in the Chinese Five Element Cycle, which is ‘allowing things to fall away, release’. Sounds refreshing, doesn’t it? A little bit lighter.
I’ve been into mantras lately, using them to help keep my self critic at bay. One that I use is ‘Let all the little things fall away’. It’s all about helping me keep perspective, especially when I start stressing about stuff that just really doesn’t matter. It’s funny how easy it is to have that perspective when a loved one is suddenly ill or in trouble, which is when this little saying popped into my head earlier this year when my dad was suddenly hospitalized for a life threatening matter. All that stuff I was just worrying about seemed to just fall away. Dad made it through! Yay!
So back to the season of Fall and the Metal Element, which is at the end of the cycle in Chinese Medicine.